When it’s finally time to go ahead and contact someone for the first time, what is the best approach? Consider the following guidelines while still adding your personal style.
Not too long. Not too short.
Some people opt for a simple ‘Hello, how are you?’ and leave it at that, whilst others choose to narrate their whole life story with a full medical history, which is probably not a good idea!
Our advice is to strike a happy medium. If you’re hoping for a reply, and that’s what it’s all about, we suggest at least 3 or 4 meaningful sentences, with a question or two to show interest.
Make it personal
People want to feel special – that you absolutely had to write to them because of their compelling profile. Include something that shows you’ve read their profile – for example:
- What do you like about their profile?
- Why do you think you’ll be a good match? (Our system shows what you have in common and shows your match score)
- Ask a question or comment on something you saw in their profile.
Keep it light and casual
When you’re starting out, it is best to leave the baggage at the door at first. The details of your recent messy divorce or hemorrhoid operation don’t make for a great conversation opener!
While others want to get to know the real you, they don’t need to know everything about you right now. We advise keeping the heavy stuff for later when you’re a little better acquainted.
Compliments & honesty?
Be generous, but genuine with compliments (without being cheesy). Also remember, honesty is one of the most attractive things in a person. It may work against you later if you’re not right or too much of one or the other.
Take the effort and Catch the Gremlins
A potty mouth might not be a big deal to you, but to a stranger it might just send the wrong message. Similarly, poor spelling or just being plain lazy isn’t going to do you any favours. ‘Ur pic r gr8t’ may work for teenagers but, believe us, ‘You have a great profile’ is far more likely to be positively received.
The Dating Sites Team